A Reddit user who didn’t invite his sister’s dog to his wedding isn’t wrong for wanting to leave his sister out of the event altogether, two family therapists told Fox News Digital.
“I am wrong for not inviting my sister to my wedding because she always Do you bring your dog?” This question was asked by Reddit user “ThinkerOfLimgrad” in a post on the “Am I an idiot” subreddit on June 27.
In his post, the man said that he is a 26-year-old young man and is going to get married in a few months.
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“One of the problems I’m dealing with is my sister (28 years old) and her dog,” he wrote.
“My sister loves her dog, a large and somewhat poorly trained Bernese mountain dog.” She added that the dog is “cute, but a devil.”
The Reddit user said he and his fiancée (not pictured) didn’t want his sister’s Bernese mountain dog to attend their wedding. (iStock)
The man wrote that his sister “carries it with her everywhere, even to family gatherings, even though many of us have told her not to do so.”
ThinkerOfLimgrad said that previously, the dog had caused “quite a bit of trouble,” including pushing guests and destroying party decorations.
“a trip family holiday dinner Last year, when no one was looking, he ate part of the turkey from the table,” the person wrote. “My sister always ignores it, saying her dog is very energetic and friendly.”
She added that “if her dog isn’t welcome she won’t come either.”
When the soon to be married man sent wedding invitationsHe refused to include the dog in the invitation.
“I know she will bring it even if I tell her not to, so I told her she can’t bring the dog and if she does, she won’t be allowed in,” he said – which made his sister “angry”.
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She “said she wouldn’t come either if her dog wasn’t welcome” – and said she didn’t care about his happiness.
“My parents think I should let him get a dog to keep the peace, but my fiancée and I are adamant about it,” The ThinkerOfLimGrad wrote, adding that the couple “want our wedding to be a calm and beautiful day without any chaos.”
The man she is engaged to marry wrote that the sister’s Bernese mountain dog (not pictured) “is large and somewhat poorly trained.” (iStock)
“I tried to compromise by suggesting she find a pet sitter for a day, but she refused and insisted her dog stay with her,” he said. part of the family,
Fox News Digital has reached out to ThinkersOfLimgrad for any updates on the situation.
Two family relations experts told Fox News Digital on Thursday that the man wasn’t being unreasonable by not including his sister’s dog on his wedding day — and that there may be more serious issues at play than just the dog.
“This is a classic example of a dysfunctional system.” family dynamicsNina Batista, a Florida-based relationship and trauma therapist, explained via email.
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Additionally, he stated that “there appears to be a lack of respect for firm boundaries and limits.”
“Ultimately it’s your wedding, it’s your day, you decide what you’re willing to tolerate and what you’re not,” Batista said.
He added that if ThinkerOfLimgrad doesn’t mind his sister not attending the wedding because her dog can’t come, then he should “stick to it”.
“It’s your wedding, it’s your day, you decide what you want to tolerate and what you don’t.”
Another doctor expressed a similar opinion, saying that this condition is not just related to dogs.
“It’s about family relationships and how we express our needs,” New York-based therapist Brianna Paruolo said in an email.
The Reddit user (not pictured) said his parents told him he should allow the dog to come to the wedding to “keep the peace” and make his sister happy. (iStock)
“That person on Reddit did the right thing in setting boundaries, but it’s normal to feel guilty,” Paruolo said.
“It’s a very good idea for (ThinkerOfLimgrad) to use ‘I’ statements when talking to their family,” he said.
“For example, he might say something like, ‘I want my wedding day to be special, and I’m worried about how the dog will impact that. Can we talk about how to make that possible for everyone?'” Paruolo said.
In addition, Paruolo said, “it might be helpful to dig deeper into why this is such a big deal to the sister,” as well as why the young people’s parents are taking sides in the situation.
“Sometimes, minor arguments like these are actually related to larger family issues that aren’t talked about,” he said.
The man said his sister’s dog had caused trouble at family gatherings in the past. (iStock)
Paruolo said that as the wedding day approaches, ThinkerOfLimgrad should “continue to communicate openly and honestly,” which “may resolve the dog issue and strengthen her relationship with her sister and parents.”
“Who knows? This wedding planning challenge might actually bring the family closer in the long run,” he added.
ThinkerOfLimgrad’s story received more than 800 responses within just a few hours of being posted – with the majority of people saying there’s nothing wrong with wanting a dog-free wedding.
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“NTA. ‘Keep the peace.’ It simply means, ‘Your wishes mean nothing and your sister’s wishes mean everything.’ Your parents “I would rather pretend to have a happy family and a ruined marriage than any kind of perceived ‘bad blood,'” Reddit user “fuzzymom2005” said in the post’s top reply.
Reddit users largely sided with the man who is about to get married — and who said he would like to have a quiet, dog-free wedding. (iStock)
Fuzzymom2005 added, “Ignore the bullying. Keep the security in place Sure Your sister does not come to the wedding or reception. Tell your parents it is not your sister’s day and if they cannot see it, they might as well stay home.”
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Another Reddit user encouraged ThinkerOfLimgrad to stick to his beliefs.
“NTA – I love my dog and call him my ‘baby’ but I will not be taking him to any wedding! Be firm,” user “unfairmilk8555” said.
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“Also, your sister might need some therapy too. And your parents should come forward and respect you too,” the same commenter added.
“They should tell your sister that this day is not for her, and that if she wants to keep the peace, she should leave her dog at home.”
