A Reddit user who refused to wheel his “extremely obese cousin” around in a wheelchair for a weekend sparked controversy within a family, but he did nothing wrong by pointing out the impracticality of the plan, a doctor and other social media users said.
“AITA refuses to bow to pressure my fat cousin Can I ride around in a wheelchair for a day?” “OneSoarspine” asked in a June 28 post on the “Am I an idiot” subreddit.
“I didn’t expect so many responses to the personal drama,” Poster told Fox News Digital on Saturday.
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The poster did not mention the age or gender, but said the cousin About 600 pounds and uses a mobility scooter. The poster says the cousin is unable to walk without pain.
“In July, her (cousin’s) out of state marriage “I was called to attend the event and I was asked to drive a taxi to bring her to the event and back, since I am not currently working, my calendar is open,” Vansorspine said.
The Reddit user explained that his extremely obese cousin usually uses a mobility scooter to get around because walking is painful for her. (iStock)
However, this has created another problem. The mobility scooter cannot fit in OneSoreSpine’s car, Kia Optima – “So my cousin has to use a wheelchair,” the person wrote.
“The problem is that the event is being held in a public park. I can hardly push her wheelchair on a paved surface, much less on grass and mud,” Vansorpine said.
In an attempt to resolve the issue, the Reddit poster attempted to contact a local medical device agency, “but they declined to lease the scooter in this case due to off-road use.”
“I can hardly push his wheelchair even on paved surfaces, much less on grass and mud.”
“My uncle and aunt also refuse to lend me their truck cause my cousin usually drives the truck … my driving history is so (terrible),” VansorSpine wrote.
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The cousin’s father apparently health issues Due to which he is unable to drive, while his mother is unable to take leave from work.
“I thought about renting a vehicle that can carry the scooter, but my cousin can’t afford it and obviously… I can’t do it either since I’m unemployed,” Vansorspine said.
“I thought about renting a vehicle that could transport the scooter, but my cousin can’t afford that,” one Reddit poster wrote about the family challenge. (iStock)
However, those involved in the wedding came up with an alternative solution. Yet Vansorpine said the cousin didn’t like the idea.
“The best solution someone has come up with is that the party has a flat bed (trailer) that they’re using to bring the supplies from the cars, but my cousin says she’d feel humiliated if it rolled over like that,” the Reddit poster shared.
“My cousin says she would feel very humiliated being rolled over like that.”
“My cousin is really upset with me, saying I’m embarrassing her by saying I can’t pursue her, but I think it’s true,” Vansorspine said.
“My cousin has done a lot for me in the past so I feel bad saying ‘no,’ but I feel like I’ve considered every option at this point,” the man said on Reddit.
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The person then asked others on the forum, “Aren’t you ready to go and try college?” The poster also requested that other Reddit users refrain from making derogatory comments about Cousins.
‘Important effort’
A therapist specializing in eating disorders and body image told Fox News Digital on Saturday that she believed the Reddit user had done everything possible to rectify the situation — and that Cousin’s response This is probably a projection of his own feeling of helplessness.
“The author seems to have put a lot of effort into finding unique ways to help the cousin, which is admirable,” Rachel Goldberg, LMFT, founder of Rachel Goldberg Therapy in Los Angeles, told Fox News Digital via email.
The Reddit user pointed out that the wedding is taking place in a public park and the cousin can’t walk from the parking lot to the wedding venue. Regarding the family impasse, a therapist said that the two people involved should “have an open conversation.” (iStock)
Goldberg said OneSourcepine “clearly wants to give back for all the ways Cousins has helped them,” adding that the Reddit user’s “sympathy is clear.”
“I think the best way for (OneSorspine) is to have an open conversation, or maybe send a message first to give Cousins time to digest the information,” Goldberg said.
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OneSoreSpine “might say something like, ‘I really want to help you with this, and I would continue to help you in other ways, but I feel limited in this situation and I can’t help you until we find another solution,'” Goldberg suggested. “‘I’m really sorry, and I’m sorry to have to turn you down. I’ve tried many different ways to make this work, but I’ve been unsuccessful. Please let me know if you have any more ideas or if I can help you in any other way related to the wedding.'”
“Instead of looking at your own challenges, it can be easier to blame someone else.”
Goldberg said the cousin’s reaction when told that VanSorSpine could not disturb her in any way “likely stemmed from difficulty accepting that she could not attend the wedding because of these limitations.”
“Instead of looking at your own challenges, it can be easier to blame someone else,” she added.
“Please let me know if you have any other ideas or if I can help in any other way unrelated to the wedding”: One therapist suggested a Reddit poster share this type of message and others with a cousin who needs transportation assistance at a wedding. (iStock)
Reddit users also agreed with these sentiments. Of the more than 3,000 replies to the post, almost all said that OneSorrowSpine wasn’t wrong to say he couldn’t move his cousin around in a wheelchair.
“Honestly, it looks like you’ve found every possible solution. I don’t know why your cousin is upset with you,” Reddit user “Having-hope3594” said in one of the highest-rated comments.
“It’s also a safety issue.”
Several Reddit users shared their stories of when they had to help out members of their own family using a wheelchair – and how it affected him physically afterwards.
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“NTA. It’s a safety issue as well,” user mental-coconut-7854 said in another top comment.
The same commenter added, “My brother rolled my mom (150 pounds) over relatively good pavement at a street fair and felt pain in his back for a few days. This is also for her safety. If you struggle with the wheelchair, she could fall out of it.”
Others have pointed out that a car like the Kia Optima isn’t built to carry 600 pounds on one wheel.
Reddit users pointed out that the entire plan involving the cousins seemed impractical, and OneSorrowSpine wasn’t wrong to reject the request. (Tiffany Hagler-Geard/Bloomberg via Getty Images)
“Unless you have a pickup and ride in the back, your car isn’t built for that kind of heavy work,” Reddit user “rare-city6847” said.
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“Perhaps this could be a warning signal for her? She’s too old to be in a wedding,” said Rare-City6847.
In response to information from Fox News Digital, OneSourcepine said there were no updates to share about the situation other than that there were still hurt feelings due to Cousins’ response.
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“I didn’t expect so many replies, and I feel bad because I want to be able to answer people’s questions,” VanSourcepine told Fox News Digital.
“But I really appreciate their encouragement and I also got feedback about things I never thought of.”
